Down from heaven she came
A second gift sent from the clouds
Natalie, her name, written with love in the sky and nestled in our arms
A reminder of the purity and solidarity of family
Without a word spoken, her presence speaks volumes
Warmth in her touch
Gentleness in her tears
Simplicity in her smile
Curiosity plays tunes in her mind as a new world awaits
Large beautiful eyes filled with passion and hope
At peace and tranquil in a world of beautiful chaos
Natalie is the final puzzle piece to a family now solidified with affection
Now brother and sister play
Protecting each other from world ahead
As mom and dad look on with pride
Dreams in the playpen
Laughter is the music of the home
A princess born from the flower garden in heaven and gently delivered to her home from the hands of the Lord
With nurturing of love, she will blossom into an empress full of fervor and energy touching the lives of everyone in her path
As we extend our hands and embrace, we are a family of four united as one
I recently heard someone say “You are lucky to be alive”.
I then spent a great deal of time thinking about that comment. It wasn’t the first time I had ever heard it, but the first time I really thought through the meaning behind the phrase. An optimist and pessimist could spend hours or days debating the merits of those words until they turn blue, shoot each other or hug it out.
My first reaction was “why?”
Why are we lucky to be alive? We are all going to die. Whether we believe in an afterlife, a spiritual resting place or higher power above our earthly knowledge, it is unknown. It is a realm of belief vs. scientific evidence. I am by no means questioning the validity of those that awake the dead and connect with the afterlife. We are all open minded to the possibility of the unknown.
As an infant, we are awakened to all things new. Our curiosity peaks and life experiences are new each and every day. As we age and gain further understanding of life, decisions become more difficult and moving forward in age, pain, suffering, hardship, disease, tragedy and loss become part of our expected routines. Then we pass away leaving loved ones to mourn for us as we take the next step to eternal rest.
That being said, “Why are we lucky to be alive?”
Humanity itself has given the prosecution due evidence to take the negative stance on this debate. National disasters are wiping away entire communities, children and infants are dying of disease before they have a chance to experience life, poverty is forcing families to live like rats on the street, greed, religion and hatred are provoking violence around the world, population increases are threatening the health and well being of the environment and technology is limiting our ability to emotionally connect with
each other.
Are you wondering when this is going to turn positive? Give me a moment, I promise it will.
This has been an extraordinary period in our lives with the Japanese Tsunami, Earthquake in Haiti, Hurricane Irene, Deepwater Horizon Oil Spill, global flooding, Chilean Earthquake and flooding, and the West Virginia mining explosion. All deeply tragic and all exploited heavily by the media.
Then I took a step back, looked at my own life and looked at things the news doesn’t seem to want to emphasis. I thought about the smell of the morning dew that reminds me of home and curling under my warm down comforter on a cold winter night. A saw the wonder of two dolphins playing in the ocean and giving all of us a show for free.
I cannot forget the look on my father’s face when he drops me off at the airport, gives me the slight stare of thankfulness and sadness for seeing me go and then hugging me like men are supposed to hug.
Do you know the feeling when you are kissed gently on the neck and then hold each other so close your bodies come together as one. It is one of the safest feelings you can imagine and one that often cannot be put properly into words. It is that feeling that nothing can happen to harm you and that the knowledge of having each other is the only thing you need in the world.
When a warm summer rain falls on you at the beach and the waves crash into the sand showing its power and beauty with each raise of the surf. The water warms your pores with earth’s shower and you are cleansed and refreshed.
I cannot sing. I cannot play guitar. I can’t even pretend to carry a tune, but I will say this, if you give me a song that moves my soul, my acoustic guitar and a glass of wine, I am in a state of utopia that nothing can bring me down from.
Not a day goes by without thoughts of my mother. For many years, I questioned everything. Why was she taken from us? We needed her. This wasn’t fair. This hit a point of hatred, but for what or who I didn’t even know. Over time, I have reflected less on losing her and more on what she offered me and how she shaped who I have become. Those are the thoughts of fondness that I now think about each day I remember her.
Last month, I witnessed the birth of a baby. I was taken back by the reality of a new life on this earth but not the deepest impact on me personally. It was the candid emotional release from the new mom and dad, the purity of the smiles and tears from family and friends and the unity the room brought in celebration. I took a step back and became an observer to this miracle. How could such a small being who cannot even speak, reach out and help grown adults release their most inner emotions. If a seven pound baby can bring a whole room to the highest levels of happiness in a brief moment, anything is possible.
Watch your dad play Darth Vader sometime and take on three children at once….You may suddenly feel a warm spot in your heart.
Are we lucky to be alive?
Yes
More than you know..
Look around you and see how lucky you are….
“There are places I’ll remember
All my life though some have changed
Some forever not for better
Some have gone and some remain
All these places had their moments
With lovers and friends I still can recall
Some are dead and some are living
In my life I’ve loved them all”
In My Life – The Beatles
As I drove through the streets of Minneapolis and St. Paul passing the places that reminded me of a comfortable feeling a long time ago when I called this home, a sense of nostalgia grew inside of me. Some of the places have remained, while others are victims to the recession. Memories raced back as I began to recall all of the life altering events that took place during my residence and all the friends that came and went, but more importantly the ones that stayed with me.
I soon arrived with dinner for Sonni, Mom and baby. Three generations together in one room. Pat didn’t hesitate to remind me that this was my second family and I need not wait so long to return. I feel as though she slipped that in more than once during the evening and the hug goodbye. I don’t know if I will see them before I fly home Saturday to see family number one. To add an exclamation point to this final visit to the home of Sonni and Sam, my framed poem for Tino was resting on the wall in the entrance to his room. My words to Tino will always be in sight and watching over him at night.
Maybe it has been the time away or the relaxing sense of seclusion I have in Charleston, but the depth of feelings that have reared during this trip seem intensified more than the last. I could dive into an analysis factoring in the birth of a child, old friends who have taken new steps in their lives and some that have remained in their current bubble. One thing remains clear, the ability to slip back into that comfort zone remains.
Tino was born into a wonderful circle of family and friends and no matter what course of life he chooses, he will always be surrounded by support. A few days prior to the birth, I went to the cemetery to see Janet Hegg, Sonni’s Grandmother who passed away in 1997. I found myself talking to her and telling her about the newest member of the family. It was somewhat comforting given that I never met her. It may be the single moment I once again realized I was part of this family.
In a few days, I will see my family. What a thought: I have the chance to spend a month with two different families. How many have the opportunity to say that.
Seven weeks is summed up in a computer bag and a gym bag. Some would find that alarming, but not me. It doesn’t matter what is in the bag, because it is never about the material value I carry with me each day. It is about the meals, the conversations, the hugs, the gifts, the quiet moments during a sunset and the laughter from shared memories that fills my bag up with each visit.
Home not only is where the heart is but where people let you inside their hearts. Thank you to my first and second families for reminding me how important these relationships are in my life.
“No matter what you’ve done for yourself or for humanity, if you can’t look back on having given love and attention to your own family, what have you really accomplished?”
Elbert Hubbard
We got the text we had been waiting all day for.
“She is dilated 9 centimeters and are looking like it may happen as soon as 8 PM.”
It is 7:15 PM now and we are not only 30 plus minutes away from the hospital, but there are cards, flowers, chocolate covered espresso beans and energy drinks to be bought. Without hesitation we departed the salsa filled bar and headed to the car. With the wind in our hair and the convertible top down, two childhood friends and a self proclaimed best friend set out to be a part of something very special.
This was just not the birth of a child,but a miracle almost four years in the making. Given the struggles and tests to their will and power as a family, this night was to become some much more important than all of us.
As we arrived, just a few moments before the first cry and big announcement, we saw both families, waiting patiently, with the back drop of the Twins game just above. Grandparents, uncles, aunts and friends all greeted us with smiles and hugs. As we sat and waited, the realization of how each of these lives would change was starting to become a reality. To add more drama to increase our heartbeats even further, we learned of an earlier scare where there was a drop in the heartbeat detected in the baby. Fortunately, the doctors and nurses corrected the concern and the waiting period continued.
The two grandfathers talked about whether he would become a baseball player, golfer, bowler or football star. The grandmothers and friends talked about the pros and cons of breast feeding and apparently the profitability of doing it for other people’s children. We will leave that segment out for the moment. It soon turned to what was about to happen and how each person in the room dealt with a similar situation when they bore their children.
As I watched two generations about to welcome in the third and realized how much the mother to be and I had been through together in the best and worst of times, I felt a relationship with a baby that was yet to leave its mother’s womb.
In a moment, the new father’s sister appeared in the doorway with camera in hand shouting “He’s here”
Like the 3000th hit or the game winning home run of the World Series everyone got up and cheered and hugged and lived out one moment of perfection forever etched in our box of memories. Mother and son were healthy and with a deep push a new life entered this world. It is amazing when you think that something so small and so innocent can have such a penetrating effect on so many people.
Now, seconds, become minutes and minutes eternity as we all waited to greet the little angel into the world and hold him up as we rejoiced not only for his journey, but how his little smile saved us all and made us believe once again in the miracle of life. Many were comforted by the instant gratification of the birth video that was passed around the room. I of course took my leave from the room for a few moments.
The nurse, in her welcoming blue outfit was soon standing in the doorway and we all knew. Then the words we had all waited to hear were vocalized, “You can all go in to see the baby now”. Grandparents first of course and then the rest of us shortly behind. As we all crowded into the room, the dimly lit room became illuminated with smiles all around the bed surrounding the mom and baby comfortable side by side.
Grandpa broke out the bubble gum cigars, as one by one mom received hugs from all her family and friends as dad held his baby boy. He was a natural. The baby just fit right in his arms. As exhausted as he was, given that he was there for almost 14 hours, he still had the energy to smile from cheek to cheek.
One by one, the motherly and fatherly instincts came out in each and every person in that room as they held baby Tino for the first time. With some, an instant connection was made as the eyes met and in one synchronized motion both seemed to smile at one another with an unspoken gesture.
As pictures were taken, conversations happening, hugs being offered and a nurse continuing to maintain some order, my focus remained only on the baby. Almost like a moment of complete focus, I was able to block out all noise and movement to see the perfect face of this newborn. At no other time in our lives are we this close to purity. It is a moment where you have the chance to share in the energy of this newborn and feel more alive than you can imagine.
Soon, we new the evening had to come to an end so the mother, father and child could rest together as one family in each others arms. When they awoke the next morning, they could look at baby’s first sunrise and know this is the first day of the rest of their lives together.
I have witnessed so many global events that have inspired, sporting events that have been deemed modern miracles and gestures that have moved nations, but the truly great miracles of our lifetime bear in the act of creation. Thirteen people stood in a small hospital room sharing in the greatest gift, the most amazing miracle life has to offer. It is a moment we will all remember and cherish.
Last night we were all family….sharing in the first and only official birthday of Tino.
Yes, it was made official as the entire room sang “Happy Birthday” officially calling this day, the day of his birth the one and true birthday.
To Sonni and Sam, the amazingly supportive grandparents, siblings and friends, THANK YOU for letting us into your very private moment. It has been an honor to be and continue to be an important part of your life.
Writer / Blogger / Social Media and Talent Acquisition Consultant / Life Geek / Photographer
Human Resources, Talent Acquisition, Global Social Media and Marketing Solutions including: organizational development, team building, change management, compensation structural development and implementation, social media and talent community development, growth and advancement, training, rewards and recognition, recruitment, attrition control, affirmative action administration, labor relations and M&A.
Trainer
So You Think You Can Interview - ProNet August, 2010 Personal Branding and Social Media Resources - ProNet June, 2010 Personal Branding and Social Media Resources - Lee Hecht Harrison July, 2010 Personal Branding and Social Media Tooling - Lenova Women in Leadership September, 2010 Your Life Bag - ProNet October, 2010, The Effects of Social Media in the Workplace - Carolinas Payroll Conference November 2012
Published Author
Sonni's Abyss (June 2008)
A Beautiful World (February 2011)
This Time Around (Scheduled for February 2013 Publication)
