“I just broke up with someone and the last thing she said to me was “You’ll never find anyone like me again!” I’m thinking, “I should hope not! If I don’t want you, why would I want someone like you.”
In the tradition of excellence in humor, last evening could be described as a thought provoking erotic sitcom build around an entire cast of supporting actors with the single goal of embracing every element of life and performing a show led by the ringmaster himself.
It was an night of doppelgangers, lesbians, strippers, strangers, kissing, laughing and a bit of warmth created in a land penned by Lewis Carroll.
It was one of those evenings after a bit of E Entertainment news you wish you could have lived. The glamorous life of a celebrity with all the perks, attention and outrageous events transpiring right before your eyes as the center of life and for just a moment it becomes you. This was one of those nights.
Now we will archive it away and move on to many more subjects of wonder and intrigue as we dig into Pandora’s box of life’s many great wonders and humorous anecdotes.
I was recently talking to a friend who had an ex boyfriend who was just focused on image that he would buy an expensive pair of designer jeans and then sand them down personally to fit the exact specs of an ad on page 57 of GQ that month. It made me think that he may be the same person I saw at the mall stopping at every mirror and making the proper adjustments. Coming from a jeans and tee-shirt man, maybe my thoughts on fashion are flawed. Of course I believe a good look is important as it represents a strong sense of responsibility, creativity, and a savvy sense of fashion.
There was a zombie crawl downtown. It is that time of the year when teens and adults raid thrift shops and purchase tacky dresses and suits only to cover them in fake blood and guts. At least, let’s hope they were fake. There are some that take the season of ghosts and goblins very seriously. Everywhere I turned, I smiled at the sea of dead walking, limping and later in the evening crawling along the streets. Funny how some people put more effort into the appearance of being dead than actually living.
Children are totally funny. On a crazy mad cap Saturday night, I watched Gnomeo and Juliet with a good friend and her two children. The same two children that showed me their favorite stuffed animals and then began to repeatedly hit me in the head with them, over and over and over again. But in the end I got to wear the pink blanket cape. Then randomly, during a tense scene, they would leave their couch, run over, jump on me and then snuggle up. Don’t you wish adults could just be that way.
Buffets are funny. They are cheap, they offer tremendous selection and give the customer the freedom to decide. But, we have an obesity issue, health care costs are rising and many individuals have difficulty with will power. A little bit funny, wouldn’t you say.
The new IPhone 4S cost 169.71 according to a report released this week in the Wall Street Journal. The cost was broken down into components, parts and labor. Labor: $8. Priceless.
Every Saturday and Sunday there is a ritual during football season, drink, drink, eat food with lots of dips and then drink. Multi-million dollar athletes that work out, maintain a strict diet and the pulverize each other each week fill the airwaves. That is 2100 athletes in the NFL and about 8000 in college. While 10,000 fit athletes give their heart and soul, over 100 million sit on about butts and fall into a pit of laziness and obesity.
It’s life funny.
I feel like I just had an Andy Rooney moment.