Is Marriage the Answer?..It can be

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Sometimes the comfort of life is found in the simplicity of routine and awareness. Last evening a comedian asked a recently married woman why she chose to get married and she replied, “It’s fun”. I almost wish it were that simple, but as we all know it is not.

Why do we get married, raise a family, lives in the solitude of a house with a white picket fence, a dog and two cats.

  1. It is safe and comforting. There is limited risk when you have the same routine, come home to the same people and know what to expect before the day begins.
  2. Avoidance of loneliness. We never want to live alone and more importantly die alone. It is one of the darkest thoughts any of us can conceive.
  3. Life is hard enough. If you can limit excess challenge and stress, it makes the rest a little more bearable. Finding someone to comfort you at night is one of the most emotionally straining journey’s of one’s life. Finding someone to share your life with is a gift, even if it is not perfectly wrapped, it is better than constantly shopping.
  4. It is a perception of accomplishment and normalcy.  Each stage of your life brings a societal accepted level of accomplishment.  As you reach a certain age, based on culture, geography, professional level, etc, one is expected to be married and bearing children.  Those that have not reached that level are all too often thought of as failures, gay, weird, crazy or any other number of personality or mental flaws.
  5. The need for intimacy.  As you get older, your physical attributes become less attractive and the availability of physical intimacy becomes more difficult.  Marriage does not guarantee daily affirmation, but it does assure you it will happen at some point.
  6. We no longer have to dream.  I see this as a negative.  When we are young we are full of wonder.  We want to see the world, volunteer to help the less fortunate, invent the next great thing, write the perfect novel, go to the Olympics or change the world.  Marriage can bury all those hopes and dreams with two simple words, “I do.”

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Here is why marriage can be incredible and stunning beyond your wildest imagination:

  1. She/he believes in you and you believe in her/him each and every day
  2. Your shared passions comes together in a perfect tapestry
  3. You laugh, cry and smile together
  4. They are the only person in focus and the vision of the them is brighter than anything else around you
  5. You want to feel the pain when they are not around
  6. You know you are not perfect and you are not ashamed to make mistakes
  7. Each kiss feels like the first.  Each morning is a new beginning
  8. The glow.  A simple day is like winning the Olympic gold as long as you can share it together.

Fall in love

Fall hard

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Take the giant leap, but only when you know; when you really know deep in the depths of your your heart that this is your destiny.  When they complete you like no has or ever will again, you will know.

It is the most unbelievable reality you will ever know.

It will amaze you.

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