Tomorrow is the second prophetic end of the world. May 21, 2011. This is the true demise of civilization. For those believers, you will be swept away to the Heavens and for the non-believers the great quake will sink you to the pits of Hell. I don’t know that Bruce Willis can get us out of this jam.
As a way of lending my support to the impending doom that will be bestowed upon all of us tomorrow, I decided to make my Bucket List for the end of the world and I wish all of you to do the same.
1. I will finally mix pop rocks with a can of Coke and see what happens.
2. I will strike up the nerve to ask out Keira Knightley.
3. I will learn the intro to Free Bird on the acoustic guitar.
4. I would like to learn to say “Peace, Love and Happiness” in seven different languages.
5. Rescue a cat from a tree (Just such a noble thing to do).
6. Cancel Facebook.
7. Finally watch an episode of Glee (Still don’t think I will like it though).
8. Get on top of a boat and scream “I’m on top of the world”….Wait I’ve done that.
9. Buy LinkedIn Stock, start a huge viral rumor that Google is buying them and then sell for a huge profit and give the money to
10. Pretend I am Jack Bauer for just a couple of minutes…How cool would that be!
11. Learn to juggle and the find some very rare Faberge Eggs to toss around (How much fun would it be to drop them).
12. Get a list of telemarketers and start calling them at home.
13. Get to the bottom of why “Gilligan’s Island” was never a major motion picture directed by Michael Bay.
14. Swim naked in Donald Trump’s pool while singing “Just keep swimming” from Finding Nemo.
15. Find a girl, propose, get married, get divorced and then regret it all in 20 minutes.
16. Have a party with only “dogs allowed” – Snoopy gets redemption.
17. Finally try a rice krispie treat with peanut butter.
18. Walk up to a stranger and say “I’m Bond, James Bond” and walk away.
19. Meet a Fraggle, Muppet or ALF. Not picky but I want to meet one face to face.
20. Give all the special people in my life a big hug and tell them how much I love them while wearing Mork’s outfit with the rainbow
21. Get slimed (Sometimes you just can’t do that on television)